《思想起》 Thought-born desire
In thought desire arises;
Desire arises, then I stifle my sorrow.
I cannot endure to mention that wayward youth;
When first we were acquaint, he said that naught would change his purpose.
Trusting him I said: ‘Heaven is long, Earth old; you and I, we two, will rely each upon the other.’
Methinks that in choice of wit and beauty such as yours, verily I did not judge my lord amiss;
But vainly have I wasted the heart’s passion, which I bore you in former days; since you could thus forsake me.
To-day I do but regret my forlorn life: I dare not regret that you, sir, are faithless.
Yet, if I be a royal flower in the Cassia Garden, why have urchins been suffered to snap my stalk?
You have wronged me: in mid-road you have left me standing, a jilted girl, alone.
If I ask what fate is in store, what destiny was fore-doomed, certes no mention should be made of you and me.
Now half my life is gone, you bid me choose another sweetheart; but it is in no wise easy.
Men when they open their lips call me a blighted willow or bruised flower; no sound fruit will be my harvest-home.
Would that my love could cling round you to the last, deep-rooted as the cypress-tree;
So, when we met in the infernal realm, ‘twould be manifest to my lover’s ken.
Of a surety in the former life my fate had no share in yours, therefore to-day I see myself jilted in mid-road.
Ah! Truly it savours ill.
Why must I still sojourn among life’s vicissitudes?
‘Twere better I died; that in heaven’s sanctuary, far from repining, I might await my lord in the after-life – even then none too late.